the one I love belongs to somebody else

You just walked into your favorite restaurant for lunch. You love the food but right now you have something else on your mind. You are expecting someone else to join you and here they are. Both of you greet each other warmly. From the first time you met on the job, there has been some intense attraction between the two of you. You want to build on the emotions you are feeling and so does the other person; sort of. Why sort of? For the simple reason, they are already involved in a relationship with someone other than you.

This is nothing new. No doubt you have heard all those songs about falling in love with another person's wife, husband, fiancé boyfriend, girlfriend or whatever. The reality is it happens everyday and in most instances, like yours, both parties go into it with their eyes wide open. Again they tell you they are involved with another person. You hear and understand but you still hold out hope that something will change the situation. You tell the other person, that they must feel the same way; otherwise they would not be here. All of this maybe true but the best thing the both of you can is end it right here and now. You maybe the nicest person on the continent but in essence what you are doing is trying your best to break up a relationship just to satisfy yourself.

1. What if it was you?

It seems when people get involved in these situations they never stop to think what if the shoe was on the other foot. Let's say you are successful in breaking up their relationship and having the other person all to yourself. Fine but now they meet someone else who attracts them even more than you do. What then? You wind up in the same position as the first person. Karma can be quite nasty so if you do not want to be on the receiving end than it is best to let it go.

2. Trust

The other person tells you they are engaged or seriously involved with someone else. So what are they doing there sitting next to you putting out feelers? Curb your emotions for a minute and think. Can you really trust someone who says they are in a committed relationship but is out looking for some action?

3. Wait

You both agree to pursue this further except that the other person cannot quite end their other relationship now. You give them the cornball line that, "you are willing to wait as long as it takes." The reality is nobody has that kind of time. Sure the two of you may get closer and more intimate but you are still the third wheel. As long as the other person remains in their relationship, you are sharing them. No matter how you feel now, this can get old very quickly.

4. The Explosion

It's bad enough sneaking around but now it gets back to the other person. No they are not going to do the "proper" thing and bow out gracefully. In fact they are ready to fight so as to keep the other person in the relationship but more importantly not to be made a fool of. Hurt pride is a powerful motivator. Are you willing to escalate the situation? Besides you really do not know what side of the fence the object of your affection will choose to stand on. You may wind up winning the battle and losing the war in a big way.

It is in your best interest to avoid getting involved with someone who is already in a committed relationship. There are plenty of people within your world who are unattached and looking to see if they can generate some chemistry with you. Maybe yes, maybe no. But involving yourself with someone who is already involved can take a major toll on everyone concerned especially you. The victory in most instances is not worth the price.

Thanks to Daryl Campbell for the article…harharhar

6 syawal yang basah...

akhirnya aku sampai gak ke rumah jam 2pagi. nasib jalan dari ipoh tak berapa jem. ikut plan balik malam sabtu tp sbb aku dah terjebak dgn jem otw balik dr bukit merah ke ipoh so terpaksalah hajat untuk balik kl ditangguhkan..lagipun bukan ade apa nak dikejarkan kt kl selain drpd kerja2 yg for sure buat aku takde masa nak berdating raya2 nih...kekasih gelap? pun dh macam2 nak malap je, ahhh biarlah dia enjoy beraya sakan kt oversea tuh..

sampai kl smlm 2pagi, telan bigmac, check e-mail, reply e-mail, usha awek mana yg online dlm ym, baca blog update blackened yg ada unsur2 nasihat dan perli aku tuh, layan dvd...aku tido 7pagi. 9pagi aku bangun. 11pagi sambung tido. 2petang perut dh lapar. bulan2 raya ni perut aku memang pantang, asyik lapar je. kalo bulan puasa tu boleh plak tahan hehehe. maybe la sbb setan2 dah balik dari kampung kot..lapar selapar laparnyer. takkan aku nak layan kuih raya. paling2 pun nasik kandar kudu bin abdul. nak ditambah derita aku, rokok pulak abis..lagi tak tentu arah jadik nyer.

aku tengok kt luar macam nak hujan. gerimis baru. naik moto je la kot..tengok moto ade 2 bijik. tengok kete sebijik pun takde. bukan ke sebelum raya dulu aku rasa aku ni ala2 orang berada, moto ade 2bijik, kete ade 2bijik, awek ada beberapa bijik..walaupun bukan semua harta aku dan awek aku..

aku start moto preng preng preng prup prup pruppp...mati. minyak abis! sial! aku try top up ngn sakibaki minyak pelita malam 7 likur, tak cukup gak. tengok moto satu lagi, harammm! dah tau nak tumpang moto kt umah orang tinggal la kunci. sial punya blackened. dahla kete aku dia rembat tak reti nak pulang balik..sportcar berkuasa rendah aku kena rembat gak...langit dah gelap ni!

perut dah menjerit nasik, mulut dah mencarut2 nak asap. dahla kedai jauh..apa ikhtiar aku..tahan cab, naik intrakota, lrt, airasia, pinjam kia rio atau jalan kaki?

dalam samar2 hujan yang lebat, kilat sabung menyabung, angin ala2 nak twister terlihat kelibat seorang jejaka cute berjalan dengan machonyer. mulutnyer berkumat kamit memaki hamun dan mencarut.

di pintu pagar, jejaka cute itu basah kuyup dengan peluh dan air hujan sehingga menampakkan nipple nyer yg menggiurkan nenek sebelah rumah.

di tepi dapur kelihatan jejaka cute tadi terketar-ketar memasak meggi sambil bibirnya yg kemerahan itu menghembus asap marlboro lite.

gampang betul...harap2 hari ni ada orang jemput open house, aku nak makan cukup cukup.

mengapa satu hari di bulan ramadhan aku selalu lepak kt emergency exit

mak kejut aku sahur....perghhh mantap semua dh terhidang. complete ngn nasik panas, masak lemak ikan, ikan masin, sambal ikan bilis, kicap tamin, teh tarik...

bismillahirrahmanirrahim, sahaja aku berpuasa esok hari bla bla bla...aku telan walaupun mata mamai sbb tak cukup tido...

sampai je ke suapan terakhir perut aku sakit, aku surrender. terpaksa meninggalkan beberapa biji nasik walaupun aku biasa dengar dlm radio...jangan membazir! sebijik nasik tu umpama setitis peluh petani. tp nk buat camne perut aku sakit...

zasss aku nyala marlboro lite, aku layan toilet....15 minit settle 2 batang marlboro lite termasuk pelaburan jangka pendek aku.

kuar je dr toilet aku tgk jam kt dinding...maaakkkk!! apsal jam kul 7.15, rosak ke jam nih? mak aku cakap ntah! sape suruh beli jam murah...cisss!!

aku tgk jam henpon, 7.14 a.m...henpon aku rosak gak ke?? aku tak puas ati, aku selak langsir....apsal terang sgt nih....?? orang ramai2 ni nak gi keje ke baru balik subuh kat masjid?

pagi tu, aku sampai opis terus lepak kt tangga emergancy exit opis aku...alang2 dah sahur kul 7 pagi, baik aku breafast roti canai ngn teh tarik terus..

nasib baik ramai kaum2 yg mak or makwe diaorg kejut sahur kul 7 pagi...ceria je ramadhan aku hari tuhh. tengahari nasik kandar kudu bin abdul licin kena telan kt umah blackened...tak baik membazir nanti petani marah....

mengapa 6 kali break ttp masih gagal...

mengapa aku tanya? bkn ape, sbb byk sgt beda nye aku ngn kekasih gelap aku...smpi skrg aku dok pikir apsal apa yg dia 'pandang' sgt kt aku. bkn ade mende sgt yg nk dibanggakan compared dgn guys yg dok usha dia. materially, financially, living standard, physically mmg jauh beza...

jam aku panerai luminor, tag heuer grand monaco tp beli kt kedai steven bkt bintang..dia? guess, guess, guess kadang2 rado, tag, lv...ori!

aku dating ngn dia pkai crocs..dia? lanyak pkai burberry..

wallet aku takat kaufmann je..dia? letak duit dlm guess, letak beg duit pun dlm guess..kekadang ferragamo..

jeans yg aku lanyak skrg levi's beli kt factory outlet..dia? pkai guess, zara or roxy beli kt australia..

aku drive kancil, kadang2 sport car berkuasa rendah aku, time merempit aku lanyak modenas kriss..dia? drive rio baru kadang2 altis. baru2 ni dia plan nk angkat vios or city. wa racun suh angkat volkswagon gt golf..hehe

aku keje makan gaji..dia? ada 3 company...walaupun proxy..

annual income dia berpuluh kali ganda drpd aku, blom kira company profit..aku? makan gaji sure tengah bulan sesak nk beli rokok dan isi minyak..

dia shopping kt garden, midvalley, pavillion..aku? takat bbplaza, isetan itupun kalo beli..

dia holiday kt turki, london, paris, new york, bali, australia..aku? paling kuat P.D, paling koman mandi air susu kt bukit belacan..

dia penah jadik finalist dewi remaja..aku? takat jadik peminat dewa 19 je..

abis tu ape mende yg dia cari dr aku? materially, financially, living standard, physically? haram aku xleh beat dia....

maybe sbb aku 'cute' kot, guys yg lain2 tuh haram muka pecah rumah hahaha.....

junior...

bermula 5.32a.m, rabu 3 September 2008, bersamaan 3 Ramadhan 1429, aku dah ada junior....tahniah untuk aku.

sedikit pasal 'kekasih gelap'.....

we're all just dancers on the devil's dance floor...blog update dr blackened ni menarik perhatian aku. mayb sbb sedikit sebanyak ade cerita psl 'love story of the year' kot...yelaaa tu!! ko xtau camne melayan dan menangani story of the year ni. bak kata org tua2, ditelan pahit, dibuang sayang. mmg kalo ikut technical, financial, biology, chemistry byk angle yg bole org pandang dan nilai. ade yg -ve, ade yg +ve. tp meh aku cite dr angle aku plak, my personal view bout story 'kekasih gelap' ni...

kes2 'kekasih gelap' ni bkn penah jadi kt aku je (so nothing to shout out sgt!!)..sesape pun pernah dan akan. sape yg penah merasa sure tahu camne. sesiapa yg mcm2 akan merasa dan nk merasa tu, bersiap sedia la...bersedialah dgn mcm2 gelap yg akan dtg...henpon gelap, henpon kena pecah, kena hempuk dgn kayu golf, gi driving range mlm2 buta, lyn bola kt craven, gerakan solo, outstation, kena stayback opis, kena prepare tender smpi pagi even smpi tahap kena cari kadi & saksi kt masjid pakistan.

mengapa sanggup buat camtu? semua mende tu dibuat bkn suka2 tp sb tak mau ade hati yg terluka..lover atau forgiver je yg cukup kering utk buat mende2 ni...loser tak mungkin berani!

setakat mana boleh bertahan? selagi strategy, planning dan time management menjadi ditambah dgn bantuan kawan2 yg sanggup bersekongkol atau berconspiracy, selagi itulah boleh bertahan...agaknye la!

tak kesian ke kt hati2 yg mungkin akan terluka? kasih sayang tak boleh diubah dan ditukar ganti tapi bole ditambah dan dibahagi2..

sampai bila? generally till the end. tp end up camne tak taula.. kantoi ke, break up ke, dead end ke tp ade jugak sampai tahap kawan2 tolong pegang bunga manggar sambil nyanyi lagu 'selamat pengantin baru'..hehehe

moral of the story? live life to the fullest, experience it...mende2 camni bukan senang nak jadi. so kalau terjadi lagi dh tau camne nk handle. carila kt facebook, tagged, ym, myspace, hardrock, planet, lorong hj. taib, swan, crown, golden horse, 21, finnegan's...ingat senang boleh dapat? dlm 50, satupun blom tentu real. one nite stand maybe tp 'kekasih gelap' tak mungkin...hehehe walaupun aku dpt dlm salah satu tmpt tu tp btul la 1 dlm 50..

conclusion? aku pun tak tau nape mende mcm ni pernah terjadi kat aku. masing2 cuba 5 kali utk stop tp end up menjadi gak. ntah camne masa tu tiba2 hati aku kering, kamikaze tahap berani mati, saje carik pasal...maybe bcoz i'm not a loser kot!?

the break up....

subang, friday, 15 august 2008, 12.30 a.m

i.R: whatever happens in the end, i don’t want to lose u as my friend..
i.A: i promise i will never be ur friend, no matter what, ever..
i.R: if we fall in luv, i'm going to feel like shit tomorrow. i'm afraid of losing..u
i.A: i know. we're taken. many hearts will get hurt..
i.R: at the end, i'm gonna get hurt..
i.A: we never start, so nothing to end.
i.R: mine started. i don't know urs..
i.A: so just let it flow. just feel the feel.
i.R: lets stop it before it flow, i don't want u to get hurt.
i.A: u'll hurt urself if u stop it.
i.R: i'll take care of it. i'm afraid of falling..falling into u.
i.A: let us fall, together..
i.R: better stop it now before it's too late.
i.A: better late than never.
i.R: no...this will be our last. no call, no sms, no date, no for everything. we're history.
i.A: u're hurting me..
i.R: i luv u. i never hurt u on purpose.
i.A: i don't care..
i.R: deal?
i.A: deal la kot..!

apsal tetiba kedai ni pasang lagu 'sentuhan kecundang'...hampehhh!!